Archive for the ‘trivia’ Category

Today I reformated my laptop and it is nice and squeaky-clean. On the inside anyway. The keyboard still has it’s fair share of chocolate and cherry turnover crumbs stuck amongst the keys. That’ll have to be tomorrow’s job. I had to reformat because something sinister had managed to get into my system and cause the left click key to cark itself. I couldn’t even click on the start button any more.

I quite like reformating. It’s a bit like spring-cleaning. You grit your teeth, um and ah and finally toss out some old thing you’ve been hanging on to forever but haven’t touched in ages. It feels awful the moment you are chucking it, but once it’s gone, and you realise the world hasn’t imploded without it, it’s quite cathartic.

And so it is with getting rid of all those files you stick away ‘just in case’. I always create a tidy folder because I hate icons on my desktop, and I shove everything in the tidy folder. I have no idea why I kept half the crud I had in there. But, anyway, it’s gone now, and I’m feeling quite pleased with myself about the big clean out. If only I could start on my wardrobe…

So now, as I said, I have a squeaky clean laptop, but there’s one problem. I have so many passwords, which were all saved on the computer before I wiped it, and now I’m having trouble remembering them. I’ve been pulling my hair out going through all the possible combinations I might have (cleverly) used in the past – all the way back to the kind of passwords I used when I was a naive internet virgin. (Passwords like ‘123abc’ or ‘Lucy’). Not a lot of luck, although I was able to remember the password to this site (obviously). One day I shall invent a password so clever that even I will remember it.

This is a story my dad told us when we were kids.  Somehow, I don’t think it’s true, but ah well, it does explain things…

Once upon a time there was an important meeting held at the council hall for all dogs to attend.  Dogs turned up from all over the world, and on arriving at the conference they were asked to take off their butts and  hang them on a peg in the foyer.  The meeting was halfway through when the building’s fire alarm suddenly went off.  Blind panic ensued, and the dogs raced out of the building, quickly grabbing any butt they could find as they passed through the foyer.

Once they were all safely out, they began to realise that they didn’t have their own butt.  From that time onwards, whenever a dog meets another dog, he checks to see if that dog is wearing his original, wayward behind.

The End (hey, that’s a pun!)

Seeing as I’m shoving all sorts of things in this blog, and it’s beginning to resemble one of those horrid myspace pages, I thought I might take one of these lame surveys too:

A to Z Survey Scintellating…
A – Available	Nope
B – Best Friend	Ben
C – Crush	First? A boy in grade 1 who was really mean to me.
D – Dad’s Name	Bruuuuuuce!
E – Easiest Person To Talk To	Ben & my friend Stella
F – Favorite Band	Crowded House
G – Gummy Bears Or Worms	Bears
H – Hometown	Was Sydney
I – Instrument	Nose flute – just kidding, no musical talent at all.
J – Job	Teacher
K – Kids	4
L – Longest Car Ride	Up to Malanda, Qld – took two days.
M – Milk Flavor	Iced Coffee
N – Number Of Siblings	3
O – One Wish	Have enough money to pay all the bills.
P – Phobias	None really
Q – Favorite Quote	Integrity is telling myself the truth. And honesty is telling the truth to other people.
R – Reason To Smile	Kids are all healthy – touch wood.
S – Song You Last Heard	That friggin Hannah Montana song – the kids are always watching Disney channel!
T – Time You Woke Up	9:30 – Sunday!
U – Unknown Fact About Me	Always sleep on my right side.
V – Vegetable	Sweet corn.
W – Worst Habits	Biting my nails
X – X-Rays You’ve Had	Bone – broke my foot.
Y – Your Favorite Food	Cherries and chocolate
Z – Zodiac Sign	Gemini

This post is worth it’s weight in gold.  Hang on to it because it is so fleeting and rare that it could end up being a priceless artefact in years to come.  Why?  Because it is my fourth attempt at posting a blog article with this friggin’ new Firefox 3, and each time I’ve accidently lost my post.  The backspace on the new Firefox 3 doesn’t seem to delete my mistakes – instead it takes me out of the page I’ve been typing on and acts as a browser back button, so I lose my post.  I was up late the other night and wrote a scintellating post full of wit and banter, but alas, it fell on deaf ears (or eyes – and then that’d be ‘blind eyes…) because stupid Firefox took on a life of it’s own and saw fit to go take me back to the Courier Mail which I’d been reading beforehand.

Anyway, the other day I was inspired by my muse (also known as ‘Cadbury’s Peppermint Chocolate’) to write about what life is like as a 40 year old, as opposed to life as a 39 year old.  In short, I concluded it’s no different.  As I was pondering this I happened to rub my chin, and found to my dismay that a nasty pimple had sprung up overnight.  Further exploration found yet another one – this time in the crease near my nostril.  It was one of those painful little sods which are twice as sore as the big impressively eeky looking ones.  Hmmm…40 years old and a bout of acne.  I wondered if my decrepid 40 year old body had begun to show it’s vintage.  Had my aging, diminishing hearing mistaken the word ‘forty’ with ‘fourteen’ and given me a rash of zits as a teenage birthday present?

As I am apparently going through a second teen-age, I am going to have to engage in egocentric moodswings, squeeze into ugly outfits which make me look like a cheap prostitute,  giggle at boys, and say stupid things on the end of my sentences like ‘like’, like.  I will have to fill my life with angst ridden poetry, and complain about my lot in life because I’m asked to do the washing up and I must be the only 14 year old in the universe who has to work so hard.  Myspace is going to have to be my top priority – I’ll have to fish out the digital camera and pose in front of the bathroom mirror while capturing my sexiness for Myspace posterity so that everyone can make such astute comments about my pics: ‘ur HOT!’  (or not, I think I’m getting a bit carried away here).

Anyway, so far, so good, I’ve managed to waffle and I haven’t lost the post yet. This wasn’t actually what I was going to post about, but, well this is a wafflelogue, and I’m lucky Firefox hasn’t had a hissy fit.  Maybe I should quit while I’m ahead, like.

1. I am an Aussie who should have been born European, as I hate the sun and sand which Australia is famous for.

2. I am a brunette, but I’ve been blonde before for a couple of years. That was hard work – and I had to bleach the crap out of my hair to get it past that orange stage. I came to my senses eventually and although I don’t have anything to blame any stupid cockups I make on now, I much prefer my dark hair.

3. Speaking of dark hair, I now have three dark hairs which spring up regularly on my chin. I have to pluck them out but most of the time one of the kids have pinched the tweezers, so I end up walking around like looking like I’m taking testosterone supplements.

4. I prefer baths to showers and only take a shower to wash my hair, which I do once a week as it is just frizzy and flyaway if it’s washed more frequently.

5. I have a teeth brushing phobia – I hate watching people brushing their teeth and seeing foam in their mouths. It makes me gag. I have to look away when a toothpaste ad comes on tv. When I brush my teeth I’m careful to switch my brain off and not dare to look in the mirror as I can’t stand the sight of it. I think it stems from my mum washing out my mouth with soap when I was young for ’swearing’ (ie saying something like ‘bum’ or ’shut up’)…

6. I went to a Catholic school for most of my education. I am an ex-Catholic but parts of the brain washing still lurks inside my head.

7. I met my husband, a professional musician online.

8. I met my ex-husband at Ayers Rock, in the centre of Australia. He was rude to me when I tried to make light talk. I should have learned then and there.

9. I twirl my hair alot – I’m a nerve wracked person. I get it from my grandma.

10. My pop was my all time favourite person in the universe. He died about 6 years ago from leukemia. If there is life after death he’s the one person I am looking forward to seeing again.

11. My nose is crooked. You can notice it in photos like on my driver’s license.

12. My best features are my ears – that’s scraping the bottom of the barrel for you!

13. I have very sweaty palms at times, I presume because of my nerves. When I was a teen I used to be really embarrassed and asked the doctor if there’s an operation to stop it – there is but it’s a dangerous one so I opted out of it.

14. I like meeting new people, but don’t like being the ‘new’ person in a group of people who already know each other.

15. My favourite colours are purple and yellow.

16. I like interior decorating, and especially love the challenge of decorating on a budget.

17. I cannot paint to save my life. I am hopeless at seeing colours and reproducing them on canvas.

18. I used to be a Mrs Beaver super-mother type when the kids were young. I was pedantic about keeping the house clean and looking good – I even colour matched the pairs of clothes pegs when I hung out the washing.

19. Now I’m a depressed lazy slob. I’ve learned there’s more important things in life than having matching clothes pegs.

20. I love to write but don’t think I practise enough.

21. I think I’ve got ADD, hence the above point.

22. My second eldest daughter looks exactly like me, so I’m told, only prettier, slimmer, and younger.

23. I went to uni when I was 32 but had to defer for a couple of years when I fell pregnant.

24. I did the same course twice, at two different unis, accidentally, and only realised it when they started talking about meanings in texts etc.

25. I studied anthropology, Roman history, and journalism for one semester before deciding it wasn’t for me.

26. I skipped many of my lectures as I didn’t have the patience to sit through them. I passed uni down to my dear friend coaching me before exams and giving me the notes in dot points.

27. When I was a baby, I got around by wriggling on my bum instead of crawling.

28. I grind my teeth at night, and sometimes bite my tongue.

29. I have a very sweet tooth, and don’t like savoury things much.

30. Consequently, I like sweet alcoholic drinks such as baileys, midori and malibu rum.

31. My favourite foods are chocolate and cherries.

32. My favourite animal is the gorilla, and maybe the elephant.

33. My dad was a sailor in the Australian navy where he met my mum, a nurse in the navy.

34. My dad is now semi-retired, and my mum is a teacher. They are both in the Falkland Islands right now, where my mum is teaching.

35. I became a teacher and teach primary school – from prep to year 7.

36. The second from the biggest toe on my right foot is slightly shorter than the others.

37. I like to sleep on the right side of the bed, on my right side. Sometimes I’m sure I’ve slept all night in the one position.

38. I love gadgets – new mobiles, computers, etc. My latest purchase was an infra-red room measuring gadget from ebay.

39. I have a heap of photographic studio equipment which I hardly use. I wanted to do children’s photography but I’m not motivated enough.

40. I had gestational diabetes during my last pregnancy.

41. I had a tubal ligation during the c-section when I had my last baby.

42. I am missing wisdom teeth – I wasn’t born with any. That could explain things…

43. I drive a 15 year old car which is falling apart, and I still have two years of paying it off.

44. I lost my virginity at age 18 at my sister’s house. I told her about it years later and she was shocked and amused.

45. My ideal home would be in a cottage in Scotland, somewhere where it snows and doesn’t get so stinking hot in summer!

46. I have Scottish, English, Irish and German ancestors. Somewhere back there was a plantation slave owner too. No convict ancestors though.

47. I don’t like cats after my ex kept a particularly horrid one which kept shitting and peeing on the floor, and I was the one who had to clean it up all the time.

48. I own a heap of power tools and would do woodworking (just like my dad and my pop) if I had a good shed to keep everything in.

49. I love the pokies, and I’ve won $1200 in the lottery once. My dad won a $40,000 car in an art union a few months ago, and my folks have won a couple of ‘biggish’ prizes ($3000 – 5000).

50. I am trying to write a novel, unfortunately, it won’t be before I turn 40 – which is only 2 months away now.